Showing posts with label bad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bad. Show all posts

The Electoral College is a Bad Idea: Originally Designed to Allow Rich White Men to Choose Who Among Them Would be President. No Voting by Black People or Women.

The Two Worst Presidents EVER were Elected Using the Rigged System Called the Electoral College. The Voters REJECTED George Bush the Son and Donald Trump. Both got fewer Votes than Their Opponents... and the USA Suffered Greatly because of the Idiot Choices They Made... 

The Electoral College Gave Us the Two Worst Presidents Ever

Due to the Electoral College’s “winner-take-all” mechanism, voters in rural areas in states with large metropolitan areas are typically disenfranchised. What incentive do these voters have to cast a ballot?

National Vote Logo - End the Electoral College - It's Absurd!

The Electoral College is killing our democracy.

Sadly, NOT Great Books: David Horowitz is a Confused Person that has written about 30 Books. He was Wrong in the Sixties and Continues to be Wrong Today.

He Awakened my Knowledge of Critical Thinking and Logical Fallacies When He was Interviewed on C-Span BookTV by Eric Metaxas... For Example... He says: Since Scientists Do Not Know the Original Origin of Life on Earth, They are Therefore Wrong about Climate Change. Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding, BOGUS! He says: The "Green New Deal" Will Pay People To Do Nothing. He is Confusing "Universal Basic Income" with "Green New Deal." They are two different ideas. REALLY... The Green New Dead DOES Propose to Take the US Government Subsidies for Fossil Fuel and Spend that Money replacing Diesel School Buses with Electric Vehicles. Actually, That's a Smart Idea! 

During the Sixties and Early Seventies he wrote books Singing the Praises of Joseph Stalin and Communism. You had to be a TOTAL RETARD to believe that... Everybody Knew that the Mass Starvation in Both the USSR and China Proved that System Flawed. The only system that Communism is better than is MONARCHY... and that's why both the USSR and China did Communism briefly... Throw the CZAR OUT! but then they GOT A CLUE and rejected Communism. How Could David Horowitz Still Believe in Marx/Lenin all the Way up until 1974? I believe in Groucho Marx and John Lennon... Much Better... Anyway, He WOKE UP when the Black Panthers (that he was working with) Murdered a Woman he Knew... and All His Friends Blamed The White Society... Very Odd Ideas... 

SO, He FLIPPED and became a "Conservative" - Another Failed Economic System. Ronald Reagan's "VOODOO ECONOMICS" has proven to be a Disaster. The Entire Concept of "Give More Money to the Rich and then MAGICALLY they will share." Just Doesn't Happen. They also Call this System "Trickle Down" Economics... Because the Super Rich Take a Piss on the Working Class and Call it Rain. The only Economic System that could POSSIBLY WORK is "Bubble Up" Economics. Raise Wages and All that Extra Money in People's Paychecks Gets Spent at American Businesses, Increasing Profits. Causing Businesses to Hire More People to Handle the Extra Sales. Reducing Unemployment Insurance Costs, Increasing Income Taxes Paid. EVERYBODY WINS. 

He Does Spend a Lot of Time in this Interview Wondering IF GOD EXISTS and How someone could Prove It or Disprove It... That Sounds Like a TOTALLY TRIVIAL QUESTION. Go Ahead, believe whatever you want... Just Don't Kill People that Don't Believe Like You Do. The Christians and the Muslims have been murdering each other for over a Thousand Years OVER NOTHING! 

Then he Declares that Democrats Favor Using Totalitarianism to Force Hundreds Of Millions of People to Give Up Their Gas Guzzling Cars... Somehow he has Confused Joe Biden with an EARTH FIRST! Eco-Warrior. I hope that for his NEXT BOOK he Pulls His Head Out of His Ass. 

https://www.amazon.com/Mortality-Faith-Reflections-Journey-through/dp/1621578135/ref=asc_df_1621578135/

I Read Banned Books - button

My Bookshelf at Home - Arranged by Height - gvan42

Great Books - gvan42

Psychedelic Art by gvan42 - Clock Tower at HSU Arcata, CA

clock tower hsu arcata ca

https://gvan42.blogspot.com/2017/08/50th-anniversary-of-summer-of-love.html

1967: The Summer of Love... San Francisco, Hippies, Flower Power, Peace, The Diggers, Haight Ashbury, LSD and the Grateful Dead. It certainly has been a Long Strange Trip. Congratulations to all those of us who have survived... One thing is for certain...

The culture of the United States was 
radically different After the 1960's... 
LSD Psychedelic Art by Greg Vanderlaan vandergreg gvan42 purple64ets gregvan

The conformism of the 1950's was blown away when LSD became widely available. Owsley made the chemical and made it available at Acid Tests with Ken Kesey and the Grateful Dead. He also gave it to the Beatles for their Magical Mystery Tour. The spirit lives on in a yearly camping trip called The Rainbow Gathering. It's like Woodstock but the performers are not paid and I'm in the Band.

---------- (~);-} ----------

The Diggers of San Francisco were a street theatre company famous for their slogan "Today is the first day of the rest of your Life." They provided free food in Golden Gate park to needy Hippies during the Summer of Love. They also created a "Free Store" where all the merchandise was free. I suppose that they were skilled in getting donations. They also walked around Haight Street with a giant picture frame that passers by could step through in order to change their "Frame of Reference." The Diggers were part of the SF mime troupe, Bill Graham worked for them also as a benefit dance promoter/arranger to raise funds  by having local bands play and selling tickets. He later became the most successful rock music show promoter in the USA.

---------- (~);-} ----------

Currently, a peaceful village called Arcata, California thrives using the basic concepts of Flower Power. It's on Highway 101 near the Oregon Border... Home of Humboldt State University...  If you want to experience the bliss yourself, take a loan from the Federal Department of Education and go to college at HSU. Arcata also is the center of Marijuana farming in the USA. The vast majority of the Grass is grown in Humboldt, Mendocino, Del Norte, Siskiyou and Trinity Counties... The extreme North Western corner of California. http://gvan42.blogspot.com/2017/06/did-you-ever-notice-arcata-california.html


----- (~);-} ----- 


"Beyond Counterculture" Book is the History of the Hippies who fled The Haight Ashbury District of San Francisco and Moved to MATEEL in Southern Humboldt County to Earn their living farming Cannabis. Originally a Doctoral thesis.

Between the Eel and Matole Rivers, Garberville and the Lost Coast.
Mateel is a Sunny and Warm.
Once PALCO logged the area, the land was really cheap. Perfect for growing Marijuana Outdoors. This location is Not on Google Streetview.

Beyond Counterculture: The Community of Mateel 

Paperback – June, 1990 by Jentri Anders.

https://www.facebook.com/jentri.anders

http://www.amazon.com/Jentri-Anders/e/B001KIM0T0/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1

http://gvan42.blogspot.com/2017/06/annotated-map-of-northern-california.html


----- (~);-} ----- 


psychedelic art by gvan42


Cosmic Art Show - Absurdist Images created in Potatoshop by Greg Vanderlaan

Free Psychedelic Art - Global Awakening is Real and Happening Now

Rainbow Gathering Idaho 2001: A Gathering of the Tribes...
I went to the gathering with a specific goal in mind. I wanted to play my guitar and sing in public. Yes, mission accomplished. I was Living in Chico, California and working at the plastics factory. When there was a layoff, my wife suggested that I borrow the car and drive over to the gathering. My friend Mike Jensen wanted to go and so we checked the oil, brake fluid, transmission fluid and water and set out on a classic American road trip. We made it as far as Reno the first day and slept by the side of the road.... READ MORE:

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Grateful Deadhead ART and MyStory... American History...

 I first noticed the Grateful Dead in 1968 in English class at junior high school. Our teacher had put up posters on the wall of the classroom and we wrote essays about them.

He was attempting to stimulate creative WRITING but more importantly,
creative THINKING.

One was an American flag made out of swastikas and another was a solarized/negative photo of 5 hairy men standing in front of "LITTLE BOXES" type suburban tract homes.

Our English teacher
stopped working for the school system that year and has never been heard of since. That has happened often to people that go to see the Dead... They change their lifestyle and start associating
with a different set of people... READ MORE:

Grateful Deadhead Tribute Webpage. Pictures and Stories. 
Many thanks to all that made the Grateful Dead an American Miracle... Just remember, if our lives together were written as a fiction story, everyone would dismiss it as being unbelieveable... Yet it all really happened!

----- (~);-} ----- 

It Always Ends Badly for People Like Charles Manson, Donald Trump, Jim Jones, Adolph Hitler and Moscow Mitch McConnell...

#DumpTrump 2022 and 2024 - Screaming Head Says - I Really Won - I Really Won - I WON - I WON - I WON
#DumpTrump 2022 and 2024 - Screaming Head Says: I Won - I Really Won!!! - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON - I WON!!!
SEE? I CHANGED REALITY USING THE POWER OF MY TWEETS!!! I REALLY WON!!!

AND EVERYONE THAT REFUSES
TO LIE FOR ME GETS BANISHED!

The GOP is Officially the Liar Liar Pants on Fire Party - Like and Share Worldwide - gvan42



Digital Yin Yang Earrings - zazzle gregvan
Digital Yin Yang Earrings - zazzle gregvan

Link to ALL My Earrings!




~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~
and then LONG AGO
I wrote this Blog Post.
It Made Sense When tRUMP
Was President but NOW...
Joe Biden is President
and Protest Is Not Needed!
~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~

Go to the White House and Set Off a 130Db Personal Alarm - Sonic Protest - MEME - gvan42


Set Off a Sonic Protest.
130dB Personal Alarm at the White House. 
Cause a Disturbance in The Farce!
Let's See If He Can Pretend It's The
Sound of Love and Support...
Screaming Madness!

~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~


Relax and Enjoy This Beautiful Day...
I Believe It's All Gonna Work Out Just Fine...

REMEMBER:
Steve Bannon=Arrested, Roger Stone=Guilty, Paul Manafort=Guilty, Mike Flynn=Guilty, Michael Cohen=Guilty, Rick Gates=Guilty, George Papadopoulos=Guilty, Alexander Vanderzwaan=Guilty, Maria Butina=Guilty, Paul Erickson=Guilty, Duncan Hunter=Guilty, Chris Collins=Guilty, George Nader=Guilty

and Soon... 
Donald Trump Will Be In Prison!

SEE? Behaving Stupid Has Consequences. Trump Hospitalized for Coronavirus... and Melania Trump, Hope Hicks, Ronna McDaniel, Mike Lee, Thom Tillis, Kellyanne Conway, Bill Stepien, Ron Johnson, Chris Christie, John Jenkins, Nick Luna, Kayleigh McEnany and Stephen Miller all tested positive... https://www.axios.com/trump-republicans-coronavirus-covid-positive-0c465d3b-b1df-4096-a1b8-6df63efbf2f7.html



LINKS TO MORE BLOG POSTS!

Police are Killing Themselves in Record Numbers - What Can We Do To Help Them? Maybe Retraining to a USEFUL Profession?

I Feel Sorry for These People... They Just Made a Mistake in Career Choice... Instead of Suicide, Why Not Choose a DIFFERENT Line of Work? Maybe Something of VALUE? Ya THINK? 
https://www.addictioncenter.com/news/2019/09/police-at-highest-risk-for-suicide-than-any-profession/

I Believe That They Can Be Retrained to Do Useful Work... 
https://www.foxnews.com/us/texas-police-officer-suicide-rate

Maybe The Endless Ridicule By The Citizens of the USA is Just Too Much? Bad Cop, No Donut!
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/record-number-us-police-officers-died-suicide-2019/story?id=68031484


MEME - Legalize Medicinal Psychedelics - gvan42

Everyone SAYS Trump is the Worst President Ever BUT... THAT'S NOT TRUE! George Bush The Son was the Worst President Ever. Trump IS THE STUPIDEST! Big Difference...

Bush Caused Thousands of Americans to Die in Iraq and Afghanistan... Trump Has Not Really Caused THAT MANY DEATHS... If You Ignore the Massive Increase in Suicide during Trump's Time in Office... and the Massive Increase of Opioid Overdoses... 


~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~


Why Didn't Trump use a CURRENT MAP? The Famous #SharpieGate Map was Four Days Old...August 29th...  If It was an UPDATE Why Couldn't he Get a Freaking Clue? It was on ALL THE TV NEWS CHANNELS! Showing the Storm was traveling North from Florida towards Georgia... DUMBF*CK! 


MEME - Vote for Biden - He's Not Insane - gvan42


The NYT Article says:
With each passing week it becomes ever clearer that Donald Trump’s trade war, far from being “good, and easy to win,” is damaging large parts of the U.S. economy. Farmers are facing financial disaster; manufacturing, which Trump’s policies were supposed to revive, is contracting; consumer confidence is plunging, largely because the public (rightly) fears that tariffs will raise prices. 

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/05/opinion/trump-economy.html

"Blue Cheese Gone Bad" - A Murder Mystery - Not One Word is True, It's Fiction! Disclaimer: No, I did not Google the keywords "untraceable poison" at the Public Library using the sign in name "John Smith". You would have to ask Mr. Smith about that.

Prolog: In the beginning, Doggod created the Heavenz and the Dirt. Later, he/she/it would create Blue Cheese... I've always wondered about The First Guy to eat Blue Cheese... It Looks and Smells Poisonous but it's actually really Good! That First Guy had Courage or bad eyesight... or maybe he was just REALLY Hungry.

~~~~~ Clues! ~~~~~

The murder weapon was a kitchen knife that was recently used to cut Blue Cheese. The yeast that makes the cheese blue has a Unique DNA and the poLice were able trace it to the specific company that grew it. Extremely expensive, the cheese was sold at Trendy Yuppie Shops that deliver... and know where you live... and are coming to get you... nyah ha ha ha ha

~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter Zero ~~~~~~~~~~

What Do I Do Now, Pam?
Delivery Boy discovered Mr. Body in the Kitchen with a Knife. He called his friend 'All Natural' Pam... She recommended that he NOT call the poLice. He immediately hung up and dialed 911.

~~~~~~~~~~~~Die A Log ~~~~~~~~~~~~

911 Operator Said: "Would You like Fries with That?"

"What?" said Delivery Boy.

"Oh, I'm sorry, you dialed 911 we also do Mickey Dees... What is the nature of your problem?"

"I'd like to report a Dead Body...

"How do you know he's dead?"

"I poked him with an Icicle but he didn't do nothing..."

"Ooooh, that's not good... "

~~~~~~~~~~ later ~~~~~~~~

Officer Faceless Drone pulled the knife out of Mr. Body and said: "Blue Cheese in the Wound." That's a Clue!... Quick, get out my copy of 'Clues for the Clueless' and see if it's listed."

Officer [Girl from] Ipanema Clone said: "Either Mr. Body or Mr. Stickums must have brought the cheese to the scene of the crime."

Officer Faceless Drone said: "That's True, they are both on our list of suspects... But... What if the Cheese was Not Blue Cheese at All? What if it was just normal cheese that had become infected with a different blue microorganism developed at Aberdeen Proving Grounds? A Secret Untraceable Poison... Military Madness like Castro's Exploding Cigar... or designed diseases like AIDS?  So many questions, and No Ledge to Stand On... deep sigh... "

Officer [Girl from] Ipanema Clone said: "and..."

"Where is all the Blood?" asked Officer Faceless Drone.

"You're right! This place should look like Andy Warhol was spraying Tomato Soup from a Firehose." Said Officer [Girl from] Ipanema Clone.

So many Questions... So many Clues... 
"Did you notice the icicles in the sink? Did someone whack Mr Body in the head with an Eye Cycle?"


"Ahh... Blunt Force Trauma... Ya Think? That would mean the Knife Wound was Post-Mortem and not very bloody."

CLUE: The Third Icicle in the Sink has what appears to be Tomato Soup on it. But... Appearances can be Misleading...



"Where are the Cameras?" asked Officer [Faceless Drone]

"That one (mounted in the corner of the room where Mr Body Laid) is covered in Green Slime! As If it had a Close Encounter With the Ectoplasm of the Ungrateful Dead... or maybe someone just barfed on it." Said Officer [Girl from Ipanema Clone]

"I can see why... The room next door to here is filled with Buckets o' Blood... and someone tossed their cookies. Great rivers o'blood, fountains o'blood, waterfalls o'blood, surfable waves o'blood, Sue Nammi's o'blood and virtual oceans o' Jupiter o' blood... dripping... swirling... splashing... and look, to make it all special and so memorable... Tossed Cookies!

Officer [Ipanema Clone] said: "Wait a Second, This isn't Blood, it's Warm Tomato Soup and there is Andy Warhol with a firehose."

Andy says: "At your service, Mam."

Action: and then he Splorched her...

Sound Effect [Splorch]

and then...

Officer [Faceless Drone] asked: "What's that Smell?"

CODE::: {Insert HTML Dropdown menu of Bad Smells.}
<select>
  <option value="dead alien">Dead Alien in the Dumpster</option>
  <option value="Odorama">Odorama Theater after the Movie's Over</option>
  <option value="muffins">Dinosaur Meadow Muffins</option>
  <option value="burner">Fire in the TV Studio</option>
</select>
:::~CODE


Pop Up Game Show Host says: "Put on your Magic Sniffer Nose... Can you tell if that odd smell coming from behind Door #1, Door #2, Door #3 or is it a Fire in the TV Studio?"

{Story Branches due to Reader's Choice.}
{Select Door #1, The Dead Alien in the Dumpster}

Delivery Boy said: "Look! Mr Body has Miraculously Healed! It was just a tiny wound and hardly bled at all!"

[Everybody Sing] "A Happy Ending or is it just the beginning... Of a New Chapter of our Story. Happy, Happy Endings... Make me sick... Oh, kill him again... Whack him in the head... Oh, kill him again... Make sure he's dead... Happy, Happy Endings make me Sick!"

{Story Branches due to Reader's Choice.}
{Select Door #2, An Odorama Theater after the Movie's Over}

Officer Faceless Drone said: "Did you know that Mr Body and Mr Stickums were business partners building the Next Big Thing at their corporation, NBT Inc. It involved pirating research into Next Big Thingism and simply connecting the dots... Like, Is there a Relationship between Chemtrails and SADS? Sudden Adult Death Syndrome... I wonder, Was Mr Body just another victim? and... most importantly... uh... Did any of you just happen to actually Touch Mr Body? uh... Wait a second..."

Officer Faceless Drone dialed 911 and said "we need a Biological HAZMAT team her right now. and NO ONE leaves this site!"

[dramatic pause]

"Oh My God! I'm Infected!"

... to be continued ...

{Story Branches due to Reader's Choice.}
{Select Door #3, Dinosaur Meadow Muffins}

[This part of the story needs to be written...]

{Story Branches due to Reader's Choice.}
{Select a Fire in the TV Studio}

[This part of the story needs to be written... but...

It will include the Game Show Host screaming FIRE! FIRE!FIRE!FIRE!FIRE!FIRE!FIRE!FIRE!]

and the thrilling conclusion...
where Officer Faceless Drone reveals who dun it. 

But First!

~~~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~~~

OTHER RANDOM PARTS OF THE STORY THAT I WROTE... BACKSTORY... Plot Thickener... Silly Sidetracks...


 The DA supposed that this was not a premeditated murder but a crime of passion. Because no one would plan to "cut the cheese" first and then stick the victim...

[Your Name Here] certainly enjoyed a good blue cheese as much as the NEXT person so [Your Name Here] was put on the list of suspects at the Police Station. Right there! Where everyone could see it. Held in place on the corkboard with a Blood Red Pushpin.

[best friend] said: [insert dialog here]
[Your Name Here] said [insert dialog here] {Repeat}
[best friend] said: [insert dialog here]
[Your Name Here] said "enough talk! Now this is time for Action!"

[insert action here] {Re Peat Again?}

"Let's bring them all into the police station and grill them." Said Drone #42

 "And serve them up with a side order of [insert name = not Fava] beans, rice and a Garnish of Wages." Said Drone #420

List of Characters:
Mr and Mrs Stickums
Mr. Body
Delivery Boy
"All Natural" Pam
Mr Unknown Third Guy
Officer [Faceless Drone]
Officer [Girl from Ipanema Clone]
Officer Drone #42
Officer Drone #420
Passerby #1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13... etc...
FlutterBy #1

Backstory of "All Natural" Pam D. Baskervilles.

Location: Lake Kittamaqundi, Merryland. Plus or Minus a random number added to or subtracted from the Longitude and Attitude.

Action: Mr Stickums Calls the deli... or Maybe it was Mr Unknown Third Guy pretending to be Mr Stickums... Maybe they were singing it? Oh Well, Hello, Deli! This is Joe, Deli, Would you please send up a nice corned beef on rye...

Action: Emma the Cat finds clues in the closet. Including a diary showing times, dates and locations... handy for someone's alibi.

Legal Background: In the Case of Spinal Tap vs Her Majesty the Queen, You may not fingerprint vomit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Quest ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What's Fun is that I have no Idea WHO DONE IT. I haven't written that part yet... [I have a clue but will not wreck the suspense...]

and Monterey Jack Bursts into Song to the tune "You May Be Right" (It Just Might be a Lunatic you're looking for) by Billy Joel...

"You may be Swiss, You may be Gouda... But It just might be a Cracker you've been looking for... I may be on a Quest... for the Daily Miracle of Food... but you would have to ask John Steinbeck about that! Yadda yadda yadda, Yadda yadda yadda.


~~~~~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~~~~~


Micro Photograph of the Hair of the Doggod that Bit You.


[Use the Celestine... I got some junk mail from KNOM Radio in Nome Alaska... so I'm incorporating unexpected concepts to seed the plot twist engine. ]

The Radio is playing... tuned to a cooking show: "Love the Lard" (It's all about the Biscuits!) ...and then... The Announcer started reading what he thought was the NEWS... but the stage assistant gave him a copy of the CLUES by instead. Totally Boinking The Investigation.

Faceless said: "That just totally Boinks this investigation. "

Ms. Clone replied: Thankfully he wasn't handed a list of the GNUs. OOOH! Stinky!"

I wonder who selected this station? Was it Mr Body or Mrs Body? and What's that horrible noise? said Faceless

"Does it sound like a cross between a Chainsaw and a Gong ong ong ong ng ng ng g g g g g... That's the Station Identification... KNOM Radio, Alaska's Favorite Mugwumps. Generally the play Middle of the Road style programming but this time they really snarfled the garfok! Ho Ho Ho... "

"But Wait, there's more... " Said Officer Mugwump. "Look at Mr Body's Computer! It appears that he has been working on the Next Big Thing! A Base 3 Computer... "


"Whoaaooaaah! Listen to the Music!
It sounds like Ding DING Ding... The NBC Chimes!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLUE ALERT ~~~~~~~~~~~
blood spatter evidence tomato soup blue cheese gone bad

Got Mail!
But it has been addressed to another person at this same address... a person of Interest shall we say? What If we got All Natural Pam to become a Rat Fink? We could have her help us Grill the Suspect. Officer Drone #42, Arrest The Delivery Boy!" said our hero.

Later... after the arrest, All Natural Pam 'Voluntarily Agrees' to help 'cause... he's so gosh darn cute...


[Editor's Note: For those of you playing along at home, go to the kitchen and get a hot Dawg! With Cheese... This goes beyond Odorama.. it's what we laughingly call "Reality".]

"Hey Andy, Maybe You know... The Strange Case of Dr Frank Olson... Did he fall or was he pushed?"


"Neither, they are all just floating away! Just like Sailor... Red Wine and speed and he just a goes sailing...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~@~~~~~~~~~~~~~.com

Clue: Delivery Boy has a key to Mr. Body's Apartment. Sometimes used to Boink All Natural Pam. Sometimes used to grill Red Herrings. {secret code word for smoke grass - note the link to an etsy store that sells marble smoking pipes - above}

"Location... Motive... Opportunity... " Said Officer [Faceless Drone]

"Illegitimi Non Corrigendum." Said Drone #42
[Translated: Don't let the Bastards Grind You Down."

"who.ru" asked the shadow... [a Russian website address]

"who, who, Who, Who" came the reply... [lyrics to a song ]

"YOU!" sang the invisible choir... [that's the odd industrial noise I hear all of the time. Kinda like a cross between a teakettle whistle and a gong.]

Action: People dressed in Wedges of Cheese costumes perform a Song and Dance routine at an airport... "I'm Big Blue and this is my friend Brie. We sing the song for ____ _____ _____ ." [rhymes with Free].

DHS Hi Jack Alert in Monterey Airport


Dialog: HI! Jack, How are things in Monterey? Said Big Blue.
Action: All the DHS Agents gathered... years of No Action and Finally... a perp!

Hi, Jack could be misheard as Hijack... to steal an airplane like the Saudi Arabians did on 9/11/2001.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~~~~~

and now, after years of  PRO - CRASTANATION... Who Done It! ( forget that Amature Crastanation - I'm a PRO)


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was The Delivery Boy with a Knife in the Kitchen. AND... He was paid by Mr Body's Son who wanted to get PAID his inheritance early. Those Delivery Boy's will do anything for a Big Tip!


The End. 

But was it really the end? No. The Son of Mr. Body inherited the fortune and he was able to hire a super lawyer and was not convicted at the murder trial. The basic defense was that while The Delivery Boy did the actual murder, there was no proof that The Son paid The Delivery Boy to do the crime. The lawyer argured that It could have been Mrs. Body or The Business Partner... Both had Motive and opportunity. The Delivery Boy said that The Son paid him but... with a good lawyer... that is not enough to get a conviction. 


So, they all went on with their lives except The Delivery Boy. Three years passed and The Delivery Boy was released by his Parole Board. He had time to plan his revenge... 


In his opinion ALL THREE of them deserved to die but they were watching him and had private police forces defending their health. He had to have an alibi and he it would be really great if it looked like an accident. First, The Son must Die... or pay off the Delivery Boy to save his own life... and so, they came to an agreement and The Delivery Boy "Retired" to Hawaii... Living on Maui smoking the Maui Wowie Weed and Hang Gliding... and that worked for years but... he had a naggiing doubt...  why NOT get his revenge?


The years of smoking weed and Hang Gliding had changed his outlook about life and so, he decided to NOT Kill The Son but to simply invite him over to smoke a bowl... They met in Hawaii and "buried the hatchet"... and then they decided to team up once again and "Take Care of" Mom and The Business Partner... and so they all got together and relaxed in Hawaii... Everybody wins! Except for Mr. Body... 


This is THE END. 


Lyrics - by The Doors


This is the end, beautiful friend
This is the end, my only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
I'll never look into your eyes, again


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