At our Dad's Funeral I got to have a personal conversation with every person that attended. We had all afternoon and each of us talked until we did not need to talk anymore. That was very healing.
My brother showed a Slideshow of Family Photographs and described who and what they were all about... He had inherited all the shoe boxes of family photos and albums and there were many pictures that we had not seen. This show was very popular with the people that attended. I Had Written a Long Speech That I Had Planned to say at the Funeral. However, I Decided to Not Say anything. I Had Already Done All the Talking I Needed to do. I Had Previously Emailed my Speech to Many Friends and Family and That was Enough. I Got a Lot of Positive Feedback About That Email... I Did Play the Piano.
We waited a year before we had Dad's Funeral. It was in the same year that Patti died so there was just too much grief to have Dad's Funeral any sooner. We had it at the Unitarian Church on Blossom Hill road in Los Gatos. From the Church you could see the "Top of the Hill" tuberculosis sanitarium that Dad lived at as a child. I found it Appropriate That I Could See The Beginning of Dad's Life in Los Gatos and The End at the Same time.
One man told me that he always wished that he had Dad's courage to speak up during meetings. Dad was not shy and freely expressed his opinions. This instance the Man was Referring to was at a Park Commission meeting and another member was droning on and on and on about something when Dad spoke up and told the speaker "We have already heard all of that, why don't you go on to a new subject."
I also got to Meet Kathy Nunn's Mom. I was a Friend of Kathy's From School and Her Mom was a Part of Dad's Bridge Club. I Always Imagines That She was Dad's Girlfriend but That was All in My Imagination. Since I Dreamed of Being Kathy's Boyfriend, I Wondered if Dad Felt the Same. They Were Both Stunningly Beautiful Women.
Martin, Vanessa and I Drove Down Highway #280 from San Francisco to Los Gatos Early that Day so we could Help the Caterers set Stuff Up. During that Ride I Told Them the "Box of Rain" Story about a Song by The Grateful Dead. Phil Lesh Sang the Vocals on that Song and He Practiced in his Car While Driving to See His Dying Father in a Hospital. Phil found Comfort Singing That Song... I found Comfort Telling that story... I Did Not Sing it While Traveling to My Dad's Funeral.
After Dad's funeral Martin drove Vanessa and I back home. We were very cheerful and Martin took an UNMARKED short cut thru the hills of San Francisco... Vanessa said it was like using the magic train station in Harry Potter... We drove fast...
Earlier That Week Martin and I went out to dinner at a Oriental restaurant and discussed what stocks to buy on the stock market. I had an extra $10,000 that I wanted to invest and I wanted his opinion. That was a really MIND STRETCHING conversation... He said buy Apple. I did buy Apple and made some money. WHEE! Sadly I never went to a stockholders meeting at their corporate headquarters... I've heard that sometimes those are really special events... a missed opportunity... deep sigh...
~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~
Patti's funeral was at a Unitarian Church in San Francisco. A lady that spoke at Patti's Funeral said that Patti taught her to "Always live your life as if what you do will be printed on the front page of the newspaper." - Dad said the same thing to me.
I Now Watch Zoom Broadcasts of That Unitarian Church's Services... Every Sunday. They are Insightful.
Patti took me to my first AA meeting in Lake Tahoe. That prolonged my life by years.
I always love meeting friends and family at funerals. This time I met Mitzi Raas. She and Alan Raas had two sons the same age as Martin and I. We had many adventures together as they lived in San Francisco and whenever our family wanted to go do something in the city we visited them. For example: Go crab fishing, visit the Exploratorium or go to a concert at The Fillmore West.
I also got to chat with Brodie, my nephew in law and he told me that they lived in Dana Point, named for the author of "Two Years Before the Mast". I Did Not Know That and I Still Have Not Read That Book.
My cousin Gary said that he had started Marijuana Farming at home. Cheaper than buying medicine at the dispensary. It's FREE! I also learned that Gary's daughter had graduated from Chico State and already had a job offer as a nurse.
~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~
During the months before Dad's funeral I was experiencing paranoid thoughts because I spent all my time on the internet posting to my protest BLOG about Anti-War activism, ecology, government spying and corporate brainwashing. I had a popular BLOG with a thousand visitors a day... I also posted Tourism Photographs and descriptions of the places I had visited after retirement. I kept on seeing unmarked white vans and trucks parking in my neighborhood... and I Drank a Lot of Coffee and Smoked a Lot of Tobacco... THAT CAUSES PARANOIA.
SO, I got in my car and drove away from the house... I went to the Avenue of the Giants to my secret place. I had gone to a "Save the Redwoods League" hike exploring the forest after the Canoe Fire. We parked at the "San Francisco Garden Club" grove and walked over a hidden footbridge over the Eel river. That bridge is not visible from the locations most people see when visiting that grove. You have to walk a quarter mile Upstream to get to the bridge... Anyway, as soon as I was on the OTHER side of the Eel river my Paranoia faded away and I felt safe. After all, no humans were there so no evil government agents would bother me... a True Human Free Zone.
I drove south on 101 until I got to the turnoff for Highway 1 and Fort Bragg. I couldn't go south on 101 due to the fire in Laytonville. Traveling down 1 on the coast I stayed at a bed and breakfast in Elk. Then I drove to Bodega Bay and ended up camping in Muir Woods. I met a bicycle rider at a swimming hole on a river and we smoked some Marijuana... I had not smoked for years and it was very powerful grass. In Muir Woods I stayed awake for most of the night listening to the Radio...
The next morning I drove to a little country store for a cup of coffee on the porch and I wondered... If Jesus came back, how would you know it was him? Inspired by the song "What if God was one of us? I was drinking coffee with a group of retired men on the front porch in the redwoods and I questioned Each person individually to see if they were Christ... or the Buddha... Including myself... I concluded that none of us were divine...
I drove to San Anselmo and Got lost... I stopped and emailed my family from the library and asked them to come pick me up... but after waiting an hour, I got directions from the owner of a coffee shop.. I cruised over the Golden Gate Bridge and went to my brother's house. I was still tense and anxious due to traffic and my general paranoia... I told my niece, Vanessa that I was "Channeling my Inner Chewbacca"... I could tell that she was frightened of me... Whenever I experience madness, people fear me. I do not mean harm but being a giant and having "That Look" in my eyes must be scary for other people...
I Slept One Night at Martin's House and One Night at a Hotel near the Ocean Next to the "Java Beach" Coffee Shop. Spent Hours Drinking Coffee at that Shop and Wandering Around The Beach and Gardens... It Looked So Elegant to Chat in Groups With Other Sophisticated San Franciscans.
That Night I Stayed in a Rarely Used Room at the Very Top of the Stairs. There Was a Fire Escape Where People Smoked Tobacco Outside because it was a "NO Smoking" Motel. I Pretended it was a Haunted Motel Room that had a Ghost... That Said: "Dead Grover, Dead Grover, Let Jimmy Pass Over." A Grover is a Member of the Bohemian Grove Men's Club. No Ghost Spotted... Just a Really Creepy Staircase to Get to That Floor...
~~~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~~~
So, We All Met at Martin's Home After Dad's Funeral. Everybody Else wanted to Watch a Football game but... I Hate Watching Football on TV So... I Said Good Bye and Left.
Traveling HOME from Dad's funeral I was still freaked out by "The Matrix" Flavor of the Bay Area. Too many computers watching your every move. At the Golden Gate Bridge there are NO TOLL COLLECTORS. No Humans! You are supposed to get a computerized travel pass to pay the toll. That might work great for frequent travelers but I have gone over that bridge twice in TEN years. Neither time did I successfully pay the toll and so I got a $45.00 fine instead.
In Golden Gate Park there was a computerized lawnmower... It replaced a human working as a gardener with a "Roomba" mowing the grass. It was Moving a Lawn that Looked Exactly Like The One in Star Trek the "Save The Whales" Movie.
There was also simply too many cars... I've been living in Small Towns since the late 1990's and Urban Traffic is Stressful. One way streets caused me to drive ten blocks in the wrong direction when we wanted to visit the Cliff House/Sutro Baths... A computer sensed when I wanted to park in a parking garage and when I wanted to escape... ENOUGH!
So, Driving North on 101, I stopped at a rest stop in Laytonville that night... I was in a location where my car radio could not get any radio stations... I put the radio on seek/scan and NO stations were within range. I finally felt relief as I was OUT in the COUNTRY... Civilization was NOT THERE. I could still smell the smoke from the fire but it was out... I relaxed there... finally... in the woods... safe...
So I Wondered as I Stayed There for Hours... What if the truck driver of the 18 wheeler parked nearby was the Second Coming of Christ or was the tourist also parked in that lot was The Buddha.... I realized that THERE WAS NO WAY TO TELL. Could be! That gave me something to ponder for a few hours... or a few years... What If God Was One Of Us? Song... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dfcpAVvt8Q
and Finally Got Home... and Proceeded to Drink Glenfiddich Whiskey Constantly for a Week... Until I Got in My Car and Drove to Chico for an AA Meeting... and Quit Drinking... Again...