Jokes, Memes and Cartoons... "The human brain is incapable of seeing a typo until its finger presses Sned."

"I took up yoga. I assume a seated posture And remain motionless for hours. It's not much, but it sure beats sitting around doing nothing." - Tiny Tim https://www.facebook.com/reel/1275194024779563

The Student asked the Zen Master: "Does a Dog Have the Buddha Nature?" and the Master Said: "WOOF"

"I wanted a Bicycle so I Prayed to God for a Bicycle but God Doesn't Work Like That... SO I Stole a Bicycle and Prayed for Forgiveness." 

Q: What's the difference between Ignorance and Apathy? 

A: I don't know and I don't care!

Whenever I go to the Bathroom and Sit on the Throne, I think of the Prime Minister of Japan: TAKESHITA... 

How can you share the Apples equally between the people using only one knife cut?

You murder one of the people and then the remaining two people get an entire apple to themselves... 

An alternative is to line up the apples so that you cut 1/3 of an apple off of each them... one person can eat the two smaller pieces and the other two people will eat the larger pieces...

<~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~>

Susan Asked: "What Does IDK Mean?

Bob Replied: "I Don't Know."

Susan Said: "If You Don't Know, I'll Ask Google."

Google Said: (Four Paragraphs of Text)

Susan Said: "TL;DR - Now I Realize That IDC."

Bob Asked: "What Does IDC Mean?"

Susan Replied: "I Don't Care."

Bob Said: "If You Don't Care, Why Did You Say That?"

Susan Said: "___ _ _____ __ ___ __" [Redacted]

To tell the truth i think that joke needs some work... What did she say??? 

<~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~>

Lone Ranger, Where are you going? "To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p9lf76xOA5k

They say that there are no atheists in foxholes... Of course not! They're filled with foxes! No room for atheists!

TV NEWS ANCHOR: "and now we go to Stevie and the Weather!" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3ywicffOj4

How many cookies did you eat Julius? Et tu Brute!

"It's Better to ask for Forgiveness than Permission." - Admiral Grace Hopper

A monk goes to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything!" and hands the vendor a $20. He gets the hot dog and says "What about my change?" The vendor says: "All change must come from within." The monk pulls out a pistol and asks for change again... The vendor says: "What's that?" The monk says: "It's My Inner Piece!"

April Showers bring May Flowers... And Mayflowers bring Pilgrims...

We could cut Defense Spending by 20% if we just made the Pentagon into a Rectangle.

I was surprised to find out that Einstein was real... I heard that he was a Theoretical Physicist...

Why is a Catholic Woman's Body like a Clown Car at the Circus? Because Both have an Endless Stream of People Just a Popping Out!

Why is the San Francisco Bay Bridge like the Train Ride at Disneyland? They Both go from Jungle-land to Fairy-land!

What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? Ivanka said: "Daddy never had a garbanzo bean on his face!"

What's The Difference Between Rush Limbaugh and The Hindenburg? One is a Flaming Nazi Gasbag and the Other is an Airship!

RU/18QTPI = The jailbait equation... Are You Over 18 Cutie Pie?

Have you ever paid someone to put a Ball in a Basket?

<~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~>

Homer Simpson climbs a mountain to meet the president of Kwik-E-Mart...

This iconic event happens in "Homer and Apu," Season 5, Episode 13 of The Simpsons.

When Apu is fired and replaced by actor James Woods, he and Homer travel to the Himalayas to meet the Kwik-E-Mart CEO, who lives in a mountaintop monastery.

The Encounter at the Top

After [Homer] and [Apu] climb the mountain to reach the Kwik-E-Mart Central Office, they are granted an audience with the CEO, an enlightened guru who offers to answer just three questions.

Rather than letting [Apu] ask about his job, [Homer] wastes all three questions in typical fashion:

Homer: "Are you really the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?"
CEO: "Yes."
Homer: "Really?"
CEO: "Yes."
Homer: "You?"
CEO: "Yes."

With his questions exhausted, the CEO casually sips his [Squishee], tells them his advice has been enlightening, and dismisses them with his trademark phrase: "Thank you, come again."

just to make it obvious... This super tool is sold inside of a plastic package that would require a super tool to get it out of the plastic package...

 

The Red Line is Also Curved.

Because it is Drawn on a Sphere...

The Earth!

"If the cosmos were suddenly frozen, and all movement ceased, a survey of its structure would not reveal a random distribution of parts. Simple geometrical patterns, for example, would be found in profusion — from the spirals of galaxies to the hexagonal shapes of snow crystals. Set the clockwork going, and its parts move rhythmically to laws that often can be expressed by equation of surprising simplicity. And there is no logical or a priori reason why these things should be so."

— Martin Gardner, "Order and Surprise," 1985 

(actually, There is No Need for Cessation of Motion... Just Open Your Eyes and SEE!)

French mathematician, physicist, and philosopher Sophie Germain (1776-1831). She obtained education from books in her father's library and from correspondence with mathematicians like Lagrange, Legendre, and Gauss, despite early resistance from her parents and challenges posed by society. She was a leader in the field of elasticity theory and received the top honor from the Paris Academy of Sciences for her article on the subject. Her work on Fermat's Last Theorem laid the groundwork for mathematicians to continue studying it for hundreds of years. She was unable to pursue a profession in mathematics due to discrimination against her sex, yet she worked independently all of her life. Before her death, Gauss had recommended that she be awarded an honorary degree, but that never occurred.

Do you think there will ever be a machine that will think like human beings and be more intelligent than human beings?

What is your take on this?

Let us read Richard Feynman’s Answer:

"First of all, do they think like human beings? I would say no and I’ll explain in a minute why I say no.
Second, for "whether they be more intelligent than human beings" to be a question, intelligence must first be defined. If you were to ask me are they better chess players than any human being? Possibly can be, yes, "I'll get you, some day".

-Richard Feynman" 

Plato the Cave...

Brief History of the Vietnam War. 58,000 Americans Died for Nothing... Something They Don't Teach in School Now... "Too Controversial"

While the Vietnam War did involve a draft, the majority of soldiers who served in Vietnam were volunteers... Why? Brainwashing? Mind Control? Project MK Ultra?

During the 1950s Americans went into a Mad Panic about Communists taking over the world. We built thousands of Nuclear Missiles and Fallout Shelters. The US Congress had witch hunts (Joe McCarthy-HUAC) to expose "Commies" who worked in The Hollywood Movie business and blacklisted folksingers that were leading our young people astray with Labor Union Organizing songs. 

During the height of this hysteria Vice President Richard Nixon went on Television and explained "The Domino Principle" while pointing to a map of Asia. His theory was... if we did not prevent Vietnam from becoming Communist, one by one those countries over there would turn Commie and soon Commies would take over the Entire World and We Would be fighting them at Our Border With Mexico...  Communism Would threaten the American Way of Life Right Here at Home!

Dominos was a Family Game popular before the invention of Computers and Video Games... Since "Everyone" Knew what they were... the US Government Named our Foreign Policy for that Game... Because It Made the Policy Easy to Understand...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dominoes

President Eisenhower and Kennedy sent advisors to help the South Vietnamese soldiers fight the North Vietnamese soldiers. 

VIDEOS: Domino Theory: Cold War Misconception About Communism's Spread...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAXLuJJuCN8

The Domino Theory, Containment and the Truman Doctrine... 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIEAzmh2nfs

Effects of Policies During the Kennedy and Johnson Administrations, USH21... 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo_qCGNd2tE

Never Forget! Three Days That the USA Was Attacked By Enemies... January 6th, December 7th and September 11th...

I Have Come to Believe Most of the "Official Story" of 9/11.


I believe that Saudi Arabians, Lead by Osama bin Laden, Hijacked Airplanes and Flew them into the World Trade Center in New York City. About 3,000 American Died on that Day... and About 6,000 Americans Died in the Crazy Wars that George Bush the Son Started in Response to 9/11... OOPS!


Obviously, He Blew Up the Wrong Countries. We Now Know that Iraq had NO Weapons of Mass Destruction, They had NO Ties to Al-Qaeda and Nothing at all to Do with 9/11... That was a Saudi Operation... However, since we are Enslaved to Saudi OIL, He Couldn't Attack our Masters... so he selected Countries that he was SURE would Not Fight back too strongly...






And then George Bush the Son Failed to FIND Osama bin Laden... Mighty Strange... They Were both Investors in the Carlyle Group (an Oil Investment Club) ... Maybe George was FAILING INTENTIONALLY to Protect a Fellow Oil Man...


And then, President Obama Found Osama and Had The Navy Seals Kill Him... and... Osama has NOT Caused any Trouble Since He's BEEN DEAD.


Joe Biden Ended the War in Afghanistan Because NO ONE Could Explain Why We Were There!


Speaking of the "Official Story" --- Some truly Strange Events DID Happen... World Trade Center BUILDING SEVEN Fell Down. No Airplane Hit that Building... Its Collapse Looked like a Controlled Demolition... It takes about a Week to set all the Charges to make a Controlled Demolition Happen... so they would have had to Start Wiring that Building on Sept 4th... Were they TIPPED OFF That an Attack was Coming on September 11th?


Another Unsolved Mystery:



All Photographs of an Airplane at the Pentagon on 9/11/2001 Have Been Deleted. Apparently, The FBI, The US Military, Google, Bing and DuckDuckGo Have ALL Conspired to Remove All Photographs from the Internet... Worldwide...

LOOK FOR YOURSELF! Is This A Deep State Conspiracy? WHY Are They Hiding The Pictures? WHY Are They Hiding The Truth?





Google Put a Lot of Effort to Scrub the Web of All Photographs of an Airplane... So there would be NO EVIDENCE That the "Official Story" is True... WHY? Who Benefits? What is the Advantage of Billions of People Realizing that We Have Been Lied to By The US Government?






Try a IMAGE SEARCH on Duck Duck Go... SEE? The "Deep State" has Corrupted The Libertarian Alternative to Google... Everyone, Everywhere is Conspiring to SUPPRESS ALL PHOTOGRAPHS of The Truth! "They" Don't Want You to Know That Saudi Arabians Hijacked An Airplane and Flew it Into the Pentagon on 9/11... WHY???

Try it for Yourself! Type the Three Words airplane Pentagon 9/11 into any Image Search Engine... They are ALL Corrupt!





FBI Vault Photo - Shiny (Not Burnt at All) Airplane Parts at Pentagon on 9/11 - This is Supposedly "Proof" That an Airplane Was Really There??? BOGUS! There ARE Photographs of a Giant Ball of Fire... How Did This Part Escape UNBURNED?



https://vault.fbi.gov/9-11-attacks-investigation-and-related-materials/9-11-images




SE Said on FaceBorg:

Right-wingers are constantly screaming that there are just as many extremists on the left as there are on the right, and they love to say that the left is just as corrupt as the right. I see absolutely no evidence of any of this, and they can never provide any evidence of these accusations. Both parties are NOT the same, not even close. There is a huge difference between supporting a coup to overturn an election and supporting Medicare for all. There is a huge difference between thinking all student loans should be forgiven and believing that lizard people are taking over the planet. I'm sorry, but none of this craziness is happening on the left. Nobody can ever provide an example of anything coming from the left which even comes close to the insanity coming from the right. Both sides are NOT the same. Maybe they were the same at some point, but now the right has completely gone off the rails.

VKK Replied:

The only major extremism I ever see coming from the left are the hard-core SJWs. Not gonna lie I laughed out loud at the lizard people.

SE Replied:

It is totally laughable, but they actually believe it. I agree about the hardcore SJWs, but at least they're living in reality. Extremists on the right have completely gone off the deep end.




When did you stop being an SJW and why?

https://www.quora.com/When-did-you-stop-being-an-SJW-and-why


Oh boy, this is going to be a LONG one because I need to get it off my chest. But it boils down to this: SJW bullcrap almost ruined every single one of my human relationships and wrecked my mental health. My fiancé (with the patience of a saint) helped me see reason again.

Alright, let’s preface this: I’m an artist, mentally unwell and a bisexual woman and definitely the optimistic chronically people pleasing dreamer type - terribly predisposed to getting swept away into shit like this. I'm not stupid, just REALLY sensitive. To a point where my brain's computing power doesn't always matter because my heart does all the thinking. So yeah, I guess in a way I AM a bit dense.

I started waking up to the reality of things when my fiancé got fed up with what I put him through for years and little by little started challenging these ideas and opinions of mine. It didn't take long for it to sink in that they weren't truly my opinions, but someone else's words shoved into my mouth. Another's slogans spat out with the force of my own anger and festering bitterness. That set off the first alarm bell.

Like a lot of people, I fell into it in my early 20s and on tumblr. At an angry age, on a platform full of other angry kids and twentysomethings who constantly validate each other’s stupid ideas and are scared to talk about what REALLY goes on in their heads. You know, the worst sort of an echo chamber. When you're young and stupid you're too young and stupid to understand you're young and stupid. Long story short I shared some thoughts with the SJWs and before I knew it I'd internalised ALL of it, hook line and sinker.

All that came out of my mouth was slogans and feelings spoken as truths. "LGBT+ people are terribly oppressed!!!! homophobia is EVERYWHERE!!!!!" was just my code for "I haven't accepted myself as I am, I feel like an outsider and was bullied for it a long time ago" for example. I externalised my feelings as an individual and thought that what I experienced MUST HAVE been the way every gay person felt. Because misery loves company. And that's precisely what the ideology is about.

I didn't notice when personal became political.
I didn't see how this bs ideology and how I went off on angry rants hurt my relationships to the people I'm actually supposed to care for. Instead of calling my parents I screamed for hours on social media about shit that’s none of my business. Instead of standing up for myself and my friends I stood up for strangers. Instead of enjoying a movie with my fiance I now criticised and nitpicked everything about it and felt threatened by him for no reason other than he's a straight white man. I didn't notice how scared I was to draw anything even remotely problematic in years and that the panic and self-censorship had entirely killed my creative drive which has been one of my core character traits since early childhood. What little I drew or wrote no longer came from heart but was a checklist to fill. I wasn't painting my own feelings and telling my own stories but trying to please others and feed the propaganda factory. There was no soul in anything I did, and back then I didn't understand why. I avoided thinking about my own pain and self by thinking about people I had been told deserved my love and support more.

I had become angry, suspicious of everyone, my own family and friends included. I was controlling, cold and manipulative, constantly fed my anger by reading about all these things that were supposedly wrong in the world. I (ironically) lumped people into groups based on skin color and sexuality or whatever other characteristic, and assigned value to people based on traits they can't control. By the SJW logic in me, a rich black woman was more "oppressed" and less fortunate than a homeless white man - which I find morally revolting in retrospect. I was suddenly scared of straight people, even though I haven't gotten a single mean word for being gay since the beginning of high school. My old traumas related to men resurfaced and I fed them and opened up about them to strangers on the internet instead of my psych team (who I considered a bunch of "ableist assholes who wanted to change me because they hate mentally ill people"... the leaps in logic were truly legendary). Essentially, the stuff fueled my PTSD, paranoia and psychotic depression.

I felt threatened, I felt powerless and weak, like the underdog. I was convinced everyone was against me, everyone except this new ideological group that gave me a sense of belonging even though I had never met these fucking people.
Then... It just hit me that this is how they want me to be. They WANT me to be weak, oppressed and powerless. See this was the logic: "If I'm a victim I have a "right" to beat "back" anyone who's mean to me." Of course this spoke to that bitterness and sense of not belonging I had always had lurking deep within me. But keeping you down is not something that people who care about your wellbeing do. This was another big red flag and a pivotal point in shifting my thinking. No person who loved me has ever said “You can’t do that because you’re x”, but these people sure love to do it.

Then, if you renounce your victim status they see it as a betrayal. If you, as a woman/gay/whatever, say that in fact you're doing just fine and nothing can really stop you from living your dream life... That takes away their excuse to be miserable and mean.

There's no empowerment to be found in grasping onto victimhood. You just turn into one miserable mean shithead among all the rest.

Ever since I realised that, my life has changed a lot since. All for the better.

Now I prioritise my work and being authentic. I keep my internet time to a minimum (in the end, I don't use it for much else than work and memes anyway), and try to shower the care, worry and empathy to my friends and family instead of strangers on the other side of the fucking globe. Instead of wallowing in how society is supposedly holding me back, I work and am doing well. I learned to trust my psych nurse doctor and therapist and believe that recovery is, in fact, a good thing and not an ableist conspiracy. Instead of telling myself I can't do x because I'm y I just... fucking do it. I draw messed up horror and weird erotica. I write the cheesiest romance I can possibly come up with and don't for a second think "oh I should probably add a black person here even though the story is set in iron age Ireland and doing that would totally not just be crude and offensive virtue signaling". I don't feel bad about myself (except for having been a stereotypical nightmare SJW) or the things I create, I'm having fun. I've been taking commissions for the first time ever for the past two years now, and I've done a LOT of portraits and a couple of book covers and some fun erotic pieces. At first I was worried not jumping through all the hoops of political correctness as an artist and sacrificing my creative integrity would repel customers but I quickly realised... I really don't want to make art for people who expect that anyway. My work is literally not for them.
I watch "problematic" old movies with my fiance. I laugh at shit that would've made me cry and rage just a handful of years back. I enjoy the shows and books I did as a kid and no longer feel like I have to let go of a thing that makes me happy just because it's "problematic". I work on my health instead of desperately trying to convince myself I'm happy with being obese and in constant joint pain (20 pounds down!) and that others are just being mean to me. I'm kind and polite to people I meet regardless of what they look like, and judge them by their actions and how they treat others. I give respect where respect is due and don't trust a single raging lunatic who tries to forcefully shove their opinions down my throat. I know that in the end they don't have my best interests at heart. They're trying to pull me into a deeper grave instead of letting me pull them up.

I know there's a lot of good, kind hearted people there and a LOT of good intentions. It's insanely easy to renounce responsibility and to blame the world for your misfortune, hell, it's natural for us humans to look for someone to blame when we feel something's wrong. Thing is, I can't blame an entire group of people for trauma that a handful of bullies and abusers with personal problems caused.

Every day I thank my lucky stars I'm marrying the man who had the courage to face that fucking beast. The one that stuck beside me all through that - I'm not sure I could have done so myself. I don't know how to thank him enough for how gentle and wise he is, or how to get across just how much I love and appreciate the fact that he cared enough to talk me out of it instead of just leaving.

American History: 9/11 Justice - What REALLY Happened? Saudi Arabia? Why Is there No Photo of the Plane at the Pentagon? WTC Building Seven? Is the "Official Story" Totally Fake?

LINK to Main Website 

of 9/11 Justice

9/11 Justice Hat for Sale - CLICK HERE

LINK to All My Hats for Sale 

at Zazzle Gregvan - Click Here!

"9/11 Justice" Embroidered Baseball Cap for Sale - Click Here!

The "Official Story" of September 11th is Totally Bogus... What was the Saudi Connection? WTC7 Fell Down for No Reason... There are NO Photographs of an Airplane at the Pentagon... We ought to have a REAL Investigation!

Black Hat With White Letters: "9/11 Justice"

This is what I Think Really Happened on 9/11: During the First Gulf War (when George Bush the Father was President) The US Military Built an Airbase in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia so Our Airplanes to Fly Out and Attack Iraq... then after the War was Over We Kept those Bases... 

This Made Osama bin Laden angry... He was a Saudi Arabian Spoiled Brat Rich Kid and therefore His Beliefs were Somehow "Really Important!"

anyway... He used some of his Vast Wealth to Hire People to Learn How to Fly Jet Airplanes and Those People Hijacked and Flew Commercial Jet Airplanes into the World Trade Center on 9/11... 14 of the 19 Hijackers were Saudi Arabian Men.

After the Dust Settled, George Bush the Son decided that SOMEONE Had to Pay for this Attack on the USA... Since We are Addicted to Buying Saudi Arabian OIL, We Could Not Under Any Circumstances Attack Them... or We Would be Unable to Drive our Cars and Trucks... and NO MORE Plastic Crap... It's made from Oil too. 

So George the Son Decided to Blow Up Iraq... They were a Convenient Target... Mainly Because We Were Absolutely Sure that they Didn't Have Atom Bombs... Remember: Never Attack a Country that Actually HAS Atom Bombs or they will Drop 'em on America... and Millions of Taxpayers Will Die. Yep, Iraq Had No WMD, No Ties to Al-Qaeda and Nothing at All to Do With 9/11... So, Let's Blow 'em UP!

and Then George the Son Invaded Afghanistan... Another Country that Could not Fight Back... and For a While, Osama bin Laden Lived There... Perfect Target! Also... They Grew a Lot of Opium so the CIA Could Make a Fortune Smuggling Drugs into the USA... 

also on 9/11 SOMETHING flew into the Pentagon... No One Knows What... and there are NO Photographs of an Airplane... Just another Unsolved Mystery!

The Official Story says that Civilians Overpowered the Hijackers on an Airplane that eventually crashed in Pennsylvania... 

One thing is for Certain, The US Military Completely Failed to Defend the USA on 9/11... 

SO... The USA had Wars in the Middle East for Decades... and Defense Contractors Earned Billions of Dollars selling Guns, Bullets, Airplanes and Everything Else that an Invading Army Needs... bribes for the locals... Paychecks for US Soldiers and Blackwater Mercenaries... (owned by Eric Prince - the Brother of Evil Betsy DeVos - Secretary of Education)

Finally... after George Bush the Son had Failed to Find Osama bin Laden for Years... Obama Killed Him in Pakistan... Then Obama Ended the War in Iraq... and Joe Biden Ended the War in Afghanistan...  I Believe that Osama bin Laden Actually Died... because he has not done any more Evil Deeds Since that Day... and he has not held any Press Conferences Either!

 

and then there is the strange case of BUILDING SEVEN... No one Can explain why it fell down. No Airplanes Crashed into it... No One Knows what Caused the Fire... Film of the Collapse LOOKS Like a Controlled Demolition... and the Unanswered Question is... Since it Takes Days to Place the Explosive Charges in a Controlled Demolition, How did they know IN ADVANCE that there would be an opportunity to "Take Down" Building Seven?

What about all the Reports of Explosions in the Basement of World Trade Center 1 & 2... Many Firefighters and Policemen Reported Them... and... Since the Airplanes Crashed into the Building WAY UP HIGH and there was NO DAMAGE to the Bottom 90 Floors... Why Did the Entire Building Fall Down? as if The Basement Explosions REALLY Caused the Disaster... 

~~~~~~ (~);-} ~~~~~~

Why Are There No Photographs of an Airplane at the Pentagon on 9/11/2001? Go Ahead: Look For Yourself... Do a Google Image Search for 9/11 Pentagon Airplane - NONE FOUND!

Answer: Because There was No Airplane... Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld Said it was a Missile... WHY did we fire a Missile at the Pentagon?

Google Image Search Results for
Airplane Pentagon  9/11/2001
#Think4Yourself
 #QuestionAuthority

There is a Bizarre Conspiracy 
Theory That States: 
An AIRPLANE
CRASHED INTO THE 
PENTAGON ON 9/11...
BUT... 
NO PHOTOGRAPHIC
PROOF...  

Unsolved Mystery

https://web.archive.org/web/20150716201810/http://www.defense.gov/transcripts/transcript.aspx?TranscriptID=3845

Secretary Rumsfeld Interview with Parade Magazine

Presenter: Secretary of Defense Donald H. Rumsfeld
October 12, 2001

(Interview with Lyric Wallwork Winik, Parade Magazine)

"Here we're talking about plastic knives and using an American Airlines flight filed with our citizens, and the missile to damage this building and similar (inaudible) that damaged the World Trade Center. The only way to deal with this problem is by taking the battle to the terrorists, wherever they are, and dealing with them." 

The Interview Took Place In Rumsfeld's Office... at the Pentagon... So that's the Building he is referring to... 

Originally Published on DEFENSE.GOV

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