Showing posts with label dem. Show all posts

Republicans Are Dying Faster Than Democrats. WHY? Old Age, Bad Choices, Poverty and Guns. Here's a Simple Solution! Become a Democrat, Green, Libertarian or an Independent! #DumpTrump #Runaway

One Realistic Solution To Dying Young is to STOP Making Bad Choices... The Republican "Drug of Choice" is Alcohol... and Drinking Causes Brain Damage, Auto Accidents, Fistfights and Cirrhosis of the Liver... Simply Quit Drinking and That FOG in Your Brain Lifts... Ever Notice RUDE JULIE ANNA? He's a Classic Example of "WET BRAIN" a Lifetime of Drinking Alcohol has Left Him Unable to Think Clearly!

Republicans LOVE GUNS! Another Bad Choice! Did You Know that The Number One Cause of Death by Gunshot is SUICIDE? and the Number One Cause of Death for Children is GUNS... and Most Children that Die of Gunshots DIE AT HOME... The Republican Love of Guns is Killing Off Their Children!

The Republican Party is

Doomed... DOOMED!

Arrest Trump Again & Again & Again & Again - meme that fits the FaceBorg "My Story"

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and now for something Completely Different...

Calvin and Hobbes:

"Calvin? Calvin, sweetheart?"

In the darkness Calvin heard the sound of Susie, his wife of fifty-three years. Calvin struggled to open his eyes. God, he was so tired and it took so much strength. Slowly, light replaced the darkness, and soon vision followed. At the foot of his bed stood his wife. Calvin wet his dry lips and spoke hoarsely, "Did... did you.... find him?"

"Yes dear," Susie said smiling sadly, "He was in the attic."

Susie reached into her big purse and brought out a soft, old, orange tiger doll. Calvin could not help but laugh. It had been so long. Too long.

"I washed him for you," Susie said, her voice cracking a little as she laid the stuffed tiger next to her husband.

"Thank you, Susie." Calvin said.

A few moments passed as Calvin just laid on his hospital bed, his head turned to the side, staring at the old toy with nostalgia.

"Dear," Calvin said finally. "Would you mind leaving me alone with Hobbes for a while? I would like to catch up with him."

"All right," Susie said. "I'll get something to eat in the cafeteria. I'll be back soon."

Susie kissed her huband on the forehead and turned to leave. With sudden but gentle strength Calvin stopped her. Lovingly he pulled his wife in and gave her a passionate kiss on the lips. "I love you," he said.

"And I love you," said Susie.

Susie turned and left. Calvin saw tears streaming from her face as she went out the door.

Calvin then turned to face his oldest and dearest friend. "Hello Hobbes. It's been a long time hasn't it old pal?"

Hobbes was no longer a stuffed doll but the big furry old tiger Calvin had always remembered. "It sure has, Calvin." said Hobbes.

"You... haven't changed a bit." Calvin smiled.

"You've changed a lot." Hobbes said sadly.

Calvin laughed, "Really? I haven't noticed at all."

There was a long pause. The sound of a clock ticking away the seconds rang throughout the sterile hospital room.

"So... you married Susie Derkins." Hobbes said, finally smiling. "I knew you always like her."

"Shut up!" Calvin said, his smile bigger than ever.

"Tell me everything I missed. I'd love to hear what you've been up to!" Hobbes said, excited.

And so Calvin told him everything. He told him about how he and Susie fell in love in high school and had married after graduating from college, about his three kids and four grandkids, how he turned Spaceman Spiff into one of the most popular sci-fi novels of the decade, and so on. After he told Hobbes all this there was another pregnant pause.

"You know... I visited you in the attic a bunch of times." Calvin said.

"I know."

"But I couldn't see you. All I saw was a stuffed animal." Calvin voice was breaking and tears of regret started welling up in his eyes.

"You grew up old buddy." said Hobbes.

Calvin broke down and sobbed, hugging his best friend. "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry I broke my promise! I promised I wouldn't grow up and that we'd be together forever!!"

Hobbes stroke the Calvin's hair, or what little was left of it. "But you didn't."

"What do you mean?"

"We were always together... in our dreams."

"We were?"

"We were."

"Hobbes?"

"Yeah, old buddy?"

"I'm so glad I got to see you like this... one last time..."

"Me too, Calvin. Me too."

"Sweetheart?" Susie voice came from outside the door.

"Yes dear?" Calvin replied.

"Can I come in?" Susie asked.

"Just a minute."

Calvin turned to face Hobbes one last time. "Goodbye Hobbes. Thanks... for everything..."

"No, thank you Calvin." Hobbes said.

Calvin turned back to the door and said, "You can come in now."

Susie came in and said, "Look who's come to visit you."

Calvin's children and grandchildren followed Susie into Calvin's room. The youngest grandchild ran past the rest of them and hugged Calvin in a hard, excited hug. "Grandpa!!" screamed the child in delight.

"Francis!" cried Calvin's daughter, "Be gentle with your grandfather."

Calvin's daughter turned to her dad. "I'm sorry, Daddy. Francis never seems to behave these days. He just runs around making a mess and coming up with strange stories."

Calvin laughed and said, "Well now! That sound just like me when I was his age."

Calvin and his family chatted some more until a nurse said, "Sorry, but visiting hours are almost up."

Calvin's beloved family said good bye and promised to visit tommorrow. As they turned to leave Calvin said, "Francis. Come here for a second."

Francis came over to his grandfather's side, "What is it Gramps?"

Calvin reached over to the stuffed tiger on his bedside and and held him out shakily to his grandson, who looked exactly as he did so many years ago. "This is Hobbes. He was my best friend when I was your age. I want you to have him."

"He's just a stuffed tiger." Francis said, eyebrows raised.

Calvin laughed, "Well, let me tell you a secret."

Francis leaned closer to Clavin. Calvin whispered, "If you catch him in a tiger trap using a tuna sandwich as bait he will turn into a real tiger."

Francis gasped in delighted awe. Calvin continued, "Not only that he will be your best friend forever."

"Wow! Thanks grandpa!" Francis said, hugging his grandpa tightly again.

"Francis! We need to go now!" Calvin's daughter called.

"Okay!" Francis shouted back.

"Take good care of him." Calvin said.

"I will." Francis said before running off after the rest of the family.

Calvin laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. The time to go was close. He could feel it in his soul. Calvin tried to remember a quote he read in a book once. It said something about death being the next great adventure or something like that. He eyelids grew heavy and his breathing slowed. As he went deeper into his final sleep he heard Hobbes, as if he was right next to him at his bedside. "I'll take care of him, Calvin..."

Calvin took his first step toward one more adventure and breathed his last with a grin on his face.

Credits: samuraitiger19 - from reddit

Note from the author - on reddit: "Wow... just wow... I am speechless here guys. I did not expect such a reaction to my story or prompt. I am not worthy of your praise or your gold. I am truly humbled. Thanks so much! I'm truly glad so my story touched so many people".

REJECT FREAK KENNEDY! Write to your senator! Tell them to vote no!

https://www.senate.gov/

RFK Jr. says worm ‘got into my brain and ate a portion of it’

https://www.cnn.com/2024/05/08/politics/rfk-jr-mercury-poisoning-brain-parasite/index.html

"The receipts show that Mr. Kennedy has embraced conspiracy theories, quacks (and) charlatans, especially when it comes to the safety and efficacy of vaccines," said Democratic Senator Ron Wyden in an opening statement. "He has made it his life work to sow doubt and discourage parents from getting their kids lifesaving vaccines."

BREAKING: RFK Jr. humiliates himself during his Senate hearing for Health Secretary by butchering basic facts about Medicaid that even an intern would know.

This might just be the most unqualified nominee in history...

During the hearing, RFK claimed that "most Americans are not happy" with their Medicaid because "the premiums are too high."

Of course, the glaring problem with this assertion is that most Medicaid users don't pay premiums at all and the ones who do usually pay small premiums.

The entire point of Medicaid is to help low-income Americans obtain health insurance and medical care. It would make no sense to make such individuals pay "high" premiums like RFK Jr. claimed.

That wasn't the only blunder though. RFK also falsely stated that Medicaid is "fully paid for by the federal government." In reality, it's funded by a mixture of state and federal funds.

When asked by Senator Ben Ray Luján how many babies are born annually on Medicaid, RFK Jr. admitted that he didn't know and guessed 30 million. The real number is closer to 1.4 million.

These are basic facts that a Health Secretary should know. But since RFK Jr.'s sole qualification for the job is that he kissed Donald Trump's ring, he doesn't know any of this information.

Kennedy also incorrectly stated that most Americans bought a Medicare Advantage plan but in reality only 1 in 10 have.

The underlying message of his testimony was that the American people vastly prefer private insurance to Medicare and Medicaid. This is a flagrant lie but his ulterior motive is clear.

MAGA wants to gut Medicare and Medicaid to funnel even more wealth to private insurers. The result would be inferior, more expensive care. These people don't care about Americans. They care about making money.

Donald Trump is making a move to seize power. Let’s not mince words—what we’re watching is the most dangerous assault on American democracy in our lifetime. Trump’s decision to pause all federal grants and subsidies isn’t just another bad policy; it’s a calculated power grab that undermines the Constitution and puts the livelihoods of millions of Americans at risk.
Here’s what’s happening: Trump has declared that he alone will decide who gets federal money. Not Congress, not the people’s elected representatives—just him. This is blatantly unconstitutional. Congress controls the budget in a democracy, not the president. But Trump doesn’t care about the Constitution. He’s decided to play king, hoarding taxpayer dollars to punish his enemies and reward his friends.
What does this really mean?
If you live in a Democratic state, don’t expect federal help. If your congressperson opposes Trump, your district is out of luck. Meanwhile, Trump’s billionaire donors and loyalists will get showered with cash. He’s setting himself up to control the economy, the government, and even your personal well-being—all based on who supports him and who doesn’t.
This isn’t governance. It’s authoritarianism. It’s corruption. And it’s terrifying.
The real-world consequences:
Let’s talk about who suffers. Kids in poor communities will lose access to Head Start programs. Cancer research will grind to a halt. Veterans—our veterans—will miss critical appointments and fall through the cracks. Entire families will lose the support they depend on, and millions of lives will be thrown into chaos. This isn’t a side effect. It’s the plan. Trump wants to punish anyone who doesn’t align with him and consolidate power for himself.
This is part of a bigger plan:
Trump’s actions this week aren’t happening in a vacuum. He’s been setting the stage for years. He’s pardoning violent rioters to normalize political violence. He’s firing inspectors general so there’s no one left to hold him accountable. Now, by freezing federal funds, he’s putting himself in total control of the country’s purse strings. Piece by piece, he’s dismantling our democracy.
This isn’t just about money. It’s about power. It’s about control. And it’s about destroying any checks or balances that stand in his way. If Trump can control the federal budget, he controls the country. And if we let him get away with this, what’s next? How long until our elections, our courts, and even our rights are up for grabs?
The warning is clear:
What Trump is doing is the definition of a constitutional crisis. This is how democracies die. One man consolidates power, silences opposition, and rewards loyalty while punishing dissent. History has shown us this playbook before, and it always ends in disaster.
Don’t be distracted by the chaos or lulled into inaction. This isn’t just another political fight—it’s a fight for the survival of American democracy. The stakes couldn’t be higher. If we don’t push back now, we may lose the very freedoms that make this country what it is.
Congress must act. The courts must intervene. And the American people must wake up to what’s happening. This is a moment of reckoning, and we cannot afford to ignore it.
Trump’s power grab is a direct threat to our way of life. The time to stand up is now. Our democracy depends on it.
Copy/paste to share.

RE SAID:
It is so disturbing that those who support him are in favor of this. Literally ANYTHING he says, goes. They will justify it by saying things like “the government can’t afford ________” (whatever the thing it is that he’s gashing or refusing to fund). I’ve heard this before from MAGAts who 100% DEPEND on having health insurance to even stay alive, when stating WHY the US “can’t afford” nationalized healthcare.
This will be no different; blindly trusting him, they’ll say “He knows where to spend the government’s money!” And then when they realize it’s WRONG, they’ll defend him!

SE REPLIED:
I was just thinking about people I know here in CA who are being silent right now instead of speaking up about the things he is doing. We WILL get more wildfires in CA, and it's highly likely that we'll get some here in the San Jose area since it hasn't rained here in months, and every time rain is predicted, the storm blows in a different direction. So it's extremely dry here right now, and it's very likely that we'll get fires sometime this year. When we need federal aid and Trump refuses to give us that aid, these silent people will probably blame Newsom for not "compromising" with Trump. The reality is that Newsom shouldn't HAVE to give into any weird demands from the president if our state is in need of disaster relief. The president isn't supposed to be making weird demands in exchange for disaster relief. He's supposed to be a public servant who works for US, ALL of us, REGARDLESS of whether we live in a red state or a blue state, he's supposed to be OUR president working for US. That means if one of the states needs federal aid, there aren't supposed to be conditions involved. Can you imagine if Biden had acted like this? Nobody would tolerate it. But because it's Trump, none of the regular rules apply. I will never understand why he has such a hold on so many people that they're willing to let him play by his own rules.

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and on 5/25/2024 I Wrote...

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RFK Jr and Trump are Fighting Each Other...

Wonderful! They can Split the QAnon Freak Voters...

and Help Biden Win!

HEADLINE: Trump is courting Libertarian activists and trying to ensure they’re not drawn to RFK Jr.'s campaign... https://apnews.com/article/trump-libertarian-convention-rfk-jr-biden-816e3209fdf993c2ba7f6caed0ebcdb7

RFK Jr 4 POTUS! He's Running for President as an Independent... With MRS GOOGLE as Vice President...

Having Concluded that BOTH Political Parties are Hopeless... and He's asking some difficult questions that no one else dares ask... Like: Was COVID a Bio-Weapon Designed to Kill off Republicans? That was the Effect but... It was an accidental blessing not a Conspiracy...

RFK Jr 4 POTUS - or Trump's VP! He's Running for President as an Independent... Having Concluded that BOTH Political Parties are Hopeless... and He's asking some difficult questions that no one else dares ask.

Independent presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. announced Tuesday that attorney and tech entrepreneur Nicole Shanahan will be his vice presidential running mate heading into the November general election.

https://www.foxnews.com/politics/who-is-nicole-shanahan-meet-wealthy-entrepreneur-rfk-jr-selected-vp

Click Here to Buy this RFK Jr. Button

RFK Jr POTUS 2024 He s Considering Running for President as an Independent...

and YES, You May Change the Text!

LINK to All My Buttons

Who is Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and why is he running for president? The lack of excitement many Americans feel about a presidential rematch has heightened interest in alternatives to the major-party candidates — none more so than RFK Jr.

https://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/robert-kennedy-jr-running-president-108225247

RFK Jr tells Jimmy Dore that Tony Fauci has been in charge of developing bioweapons for the Pentagon since 2002, and in 2014, three viruses escaped from US labs, so he moved his bioweapons research to the Wuhan lab:

"They took the money that Cheney gave them [from the Patriot Act], $2.2 billion, and they funneled it through NIH, and it all went through Anthony Fauci. So beginning in 2002, Anthony Fauci got a 68% raise from the Pentagon for doing bioweapons development, and he got a raise of billions of dollars a year, and then he started doing all of this gain-of-function.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkkApJEvYpI

Former CDC Director Robert Redfield recently testified before a Congressional committee that NIAID Director Anthony Fauci had funded gain-of-function research into coronaviruses at the Wuhan lab that is suspected of being the source of COVID. Fauci of course famously testified under oath that he had NOT funded gain-of-function research, so SOMEONE is lying. Jimmy and guest Robert F. Kennedy jr. discuss Fauci’s sordid record of corruption, skirting the law and getting in bed with the Defense Department to research bioweaponry. Follow Robert F. Kennedy Jr. on Twitter: / robertkennedyjr

https://www.politico.com/news/magazine/2023/10/08/robert-f-kennedy-jr-2024-campaign-profile-00119959

Mirror: https://purple64ets.wordpress.com/2024/03/18/trump-was-a-disaster-as-president/

RFK Jr is Asking Troubling Questions. Are Weird Chemicals in our Water Causing Mass Insanity? Should We Legalize Marijuana and Psychedelics? Talking Heads on TV News MOCK These Questions as CrazyTalk® However... He Has a Valid Point! For Example: The National Institute of Health Says:

Endocrine Disruptors in Water and Their Effects on the Reproductive System...
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32178293/
Anthropogenic contaminants in water can impose risks to reproductive health. Most of these compounds are known to be endocrine disrupting chemicals (EDCs). EDCs can impact the endocrine system and subsequently impair the development and fertility of non-human animals and humans. The source of chemical contamination in water is diverse, originating from byproducts formed during water disinfection processes, release from industry and livestock activity, or therapeutic drugs released into sewage.

Risk of endocrine disrupting compounds in drinking water...
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41545-018-0029-3
Access to safe water is a crucial factor in determining environmental sustainability, public health, and economic prosperity. Endocrine disrupting compounds (EDCs) are an environmental contaminant of growing concern, which undermine the safety of drinking water.

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LIVE: Democratic Presidential Candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Delivers Foreign Policy Speech...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZUZZTtZw_s

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The Legalization of Marijuana and Psychedelics Nationwide is OBVIOUSLY a Good Idea. Tax Them and Use the Money to Build Drug Rehab Programs... PLUS: We could Save a Fortune Currently Wasted on Law Enforcement and Incarceration... We COULD Retrain Policemen to Do Something Useful with their LIVES!

A Little Known Benefit to Legalization is FDA Quality Control and Accurate Doseage... Currently, Criminals Selling "ACID" may be Selling a Random Assortment of Chemicals that Make People Feel Strange... For Example: Fentanyl mixed with Methamphetamine... Yes, THAT would take You on a "TRIP" but it could Kill You...

RFK Jr Button for sale on Zazzle Gregvan

LINK: All My Buttons - Click Here!

RFK Jr is Wrong. COVID-19 Is Not a BioWeapon Designed to Kill Republicans. Yes, That's What Happened but It Was Not Intentionally Engineered that Way... We Were Just Lucky...

Remember: ANTI-VAX LIES On The Internet Have Killed Off More Republicans Than Democrats. THANK YOU FOR DYING! We Certainly Don't Need People Like That in the Future...

More than 1.1 million Americans have died from COVID-19. It Seems that It Wasn't a "Democratic Hoax" After All... Trump Lied, People Died...

Studies have also found that more Republicans than Democrats have died from COVID-19. According to a study, excess death rates in Florida and Ohio were 76% higher among registered Republicans than Democrats from March 2020 to December 2021.
https://www.usnews.com/news/the-report/articles/2023-03-10/three-years-into-the-pandemic-who-is-dying-from-covid-19-now

Covid death rates are higher among Republicans than Democrats, mounting evidence shows. Lower vaccination rates among Republicans could explain the partisan gap, but some researchers say mask use and social distancing were bigger factors.
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/covid-death-rates-higher-republicans-democrats-why-rcna50883

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EXCLUSIVE: Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Planning to Announce Independent Run...

https://www.mediaite.com/politics/exclusive-robert-f-kennedy-jr-planning-to-announce-independent-run/

2024 presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. plans to announce he will run as an independent on October 9 in Pennsylvania, Mediaite has learned.
Kennedy’s campaign machine is now planning “attack ads” against the Democratic National Committee in order to “pave the way” for his announcement in Philadelphia about running as an independent, according to a text reviewed by Mediaite.
“Bobby feels that the DNC is changing the rules to exclude his candidacy so an independent run is the only way to go,” a Kennedy campaign insider told Mediaite.

Poll: RFK Jr. would pull more support from Trump than Biden...

RFK Jr. has hinted at an independent run
In the poll, Kennedy garnered 19% of support
A Super PAC supporting RFK Jr. commissioned the poll

https://www.newsnationnow.com/politics/2024-election/poll-rfk-jr-would-pull-more-support-from-trump-than-biden/

"I believe that with the advent of acid, we discovered a new way to think, and it has to do with piecing together new thoughts in your mind. Why is it that people think it's so evil? What is it about it that scares people so deeply, even the guy that invented it, what is it? Because they're afraid that there's more to reality than they have confronted. That there are doors that they're afraid to go in, and they don't want us to go in there either, because if we go in we might learn something that they don't know. And that makes us a little out of their control." —Ken Kesey, "The Beyond Within: The Rise and Fall of LSD," 1987

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SE SAID:

I've always found it frustrating that when you shop for vintage clothing, the sizes are always ridiculously tiny. I've often wondered why it seems like women in the 50's and 60's were so tiny compared to modern women. I realize there is a lot of obesity in today's world, but I'm not talking about obesity, I'm talking about average-sized women, like a size 6 or 8. And yes, I know that there is a thing nowadays called "vanity sizing," where they take what was formerly a size 10 and call it a 6 just to make women feel better about their size. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm a fairly average-sized woman, not super tiny, but not what most people consider overweight. I typically wear a size 6 or a medium in most things. But vintage clothes are almost always so small that they look like they would fit a child. I can tell from looking at old photos that the average woman in the 50's and 60's wasn't that tiny. My mother and my grandmothers were around my size, and when I look at other old photos, I see women of all shapes and sizes, just like nowadays. So why is it that all of the vintage clothing is so ridiculously tiny?? It's not because women in the 50's and 60's were so much smaller, it's because those are the articles of clothing that have survived until now. Those ridiculously small dresses from the 50's and 60's are in vintage clothing stores now because nobody fit into them in the 50's and 60's either, so they were never worn, and that's why they still look brand new in 2021. The ones which fit NORMAL-sized women eventually got worn out, so they didn't survive to end up in vintage stores in 2021. Only the ones which DIDN'T get worn out survived 60 years to end up in vintage stores in 2021. The fact that vintage dresses are so tiny does NOT mean women were super tiny back then. It means that very few women were tiny enough to fit those sizes, so that's why those are the sizes that still exist today.

Aaron Standish

Happy April Fools to my first comedy writing partner the artist and poet Steve Ferchaud-

The past two days are a confluence of holidays that happens only rarely. Yesterday it was all “Bless Our Lord and Savior Who Died On The Cross And Rose Three Days Later To Save Us From Our Sins” and today it’s “April Fools!”. Makes sense to me.
When was the last time you were at a good old fashioned orgy? If you’re like me and Ms. Merry it’s probably been a few years. Living in Manton doesn’t provide a lot of access to Bacchanalia despite being the wino capital of Tehama County. If we were going to party like it’s 1999 we’d have to drive all the way to Reno or some other swinger town like Yuba City. Then we’d have to stay up way past our bedtime–normally 8 or 9 depending on how many MASH re-runs we watch–and at least one of us would have to have sex with a bunch of strangers and then drive the other one home because he wore himself out watching. We’re too old for that.
We’re too old for a lot of stuff anymore. Looking in the mirror, day drinking, and loading our own ammo to name but a few. What happened? We used to be able to run a full time business for fake hippies (all hail Wild Oak, which did what every kid from Red Bluff wants to do when they reach their twenties–move to the coast), grow massive home gardens, keep a dozen animals in line, write and perform a couple new comedy shows every year and still have time to break plenty of God’s laws with impunity. Now we’re lucky if we get enough firewood up on the porch to keep the house warm for naptime.
But we’re trying. We haven’t sunk to bocce yet. The other day we took our two remaining dogs for a hike out Ponderosa Way. Swamper and Lucky. Two dogs that live up to their dumb names. It’s easy to picture the hound Swamper tipping over a canoe, jumping to shore for his own safety and barking madly at you as you sank. Lucky is a reactive junkyard shepherdmuttbull with more lives than a schizophrenic cat. Together they are almost one good dog about half the time.
Ponderosa Way was originally an 800 mile firebreak built during the Great Depression by the Civilian Conservation Corps. Out of work citizens hired by the government to labor for the greater good. Say what? The remaining Manton sections are mostly used for horseback riding, mountain biking, dog losing, gun blasting, truck stucking, love making and the occasional body dumping. Some of us do it all.
The dog walk turned out to be a disaster. Swamper bellowed the whole time, causing small avalanches and waking up bears. Lucky chased some guy in a jeep for two canyons before giving up and waiting for us in a mud puddle. We’re going to try it again without them next week.
When we got home I started waxing philosophical (which is easier than waxing physical, or so I’m told) about how we could barely get through a dog walk when we used to work all day and play all night. I guess it’s like the late, great two fingered typer of local lore Robert Minch used to say “I knew it was time to stop going to orgies when they stopped inviting me.” Or something like that. I think he also said “Where’s my obit, bitches?” Fair question.
Speaking of things that aren’t the same anymore–The Board of Supervisors. The recent election brought new names to the board and new challenges to joke writers. For the second election in a row. Let’s be honest-sensible supervisors are good for the county, but suck for comedy. The clown show of only two years ago was much more entertaining than anything this younger and more thoughtful group will be able to pull off.
Who doesn’t miss Bob Williams calling all the women in the room cunts? Or taking bets on when Dennis Garton’s heart would explode from…well, almost anything. But usually from organized potheads who relished talking smart to him just to watch his face turn color. And while soon-to-be-former-supe John Leach did a fair impersonation of imitating a sleepy disinterested Burt Bundy after replacing him in 2022, there has never been serious discussion of whether or not Leach was actually dead during the meetings. (Bundy has since been buried, so we assume he was.) The only ‘new’ supervisor that has continued the grand tradition of being both a curmudgeon and a condescending know-it-all is Bill Moule, he of the glass house. But Moule will soon be replaced by Robert Burroughs and can go back to being a danger on the road.
None of the new kids seem to have prohibition or mean-spiritedness as a priority. Unlike Williams, Garton and certain snarky columnists. Water management is finally considered a serious issue. In-Home Support Service workers got a new contract and a rational approach to cannabis is underway. Where’s the fun in that? How are witty wags supposed to mock sensible, decent, hardworking (and underpaid) public servants? Well, let me take a shot-
Pati Nolen (seated, D3) is my friend and neighbor. If you’re anything like the rest of my Manton neighbors, that probably scares you. It scares me.
Matt Hansen (seated, D4) used to be a cop. If you’re anything like the rest of my Manton neighbors, that probably scares you. Still a hero for unseating and spanking Williams in 2022.
Greg Jones (incoming, D5) is a smart nut farmer who understands there are more solutions to failing wells than drilling deeper. He may get fragged by nuttier nut farmers.
Robert Burroghs (incoming, D1) is a decorated combat vet with enough medals to start a wind chime business, but wouldn’t answer media questions about…well, anything. Apparently a winning strategy.
Tom Walker (incoming, D2) is the young blood choice of the good old boys, replacing Candy Carlson and making Williams and Garton sneer in glee. He may be the only fun left to have.
The noobs don’t take their seats until January, but the voters have spoken. Out with the old, in with the less old. A clean slate in two years.
Or as Bobby the Minch used to say “What this orgy needs is some fresh faces with new ideas. And some lube.” I say, indeed.
(Aaron Standish did stand-up comedy for years, but got tired and sat down. He’s married to Liz Merry. Or at least he was before he posted this parody of her local column “The Merry Mantonian” which is published weekly in The Red Bluff Daily News

So this is the first thing that appears to me on Facebook…and before my coffee I might add. It is April Fools greetings from one of my best friends, Aaron Standish. We you used to write and perform comedy back in the day when we weren’t old enough to know better but young enough not to care. But as they say, with friends like these, who needs enemas? He taught me how to be a better writer… He also taught me to tie my shoes and look both ways before crossing. Actually, he didn’t help me with the last two, I just let him believe it, because it makes him happy when he is drunk reminiscing. Happy April Fools Day, old chum, and thanks for all the fun

April Fools Day
High Holy Day
Of Fools
Everybody Plays the Fool
Sometimes
A Chain Of Fools
Such As I, Rushing In
We Will Be Fooled Again
True Foolishness
Comes From Within
A Foolish Light
Showing Us The Way
Through The Foolisher Darkness
Other Fools May Follow
But We Were Fooled
First
First of Fools, Last To Laugh
April, Come She Will
Or She’ll Fake It
Fool You Once, Shame On Her
Fool You Twice, You’re Hooked
Do Not Let The Wise Men
Fool You
Out Of Your Gift
Of Making Fools
Of Them
Your Cup Is Not
Half Empty
It Is
Half Fool

Republicans Are Dying Faster Than Democrats. WHY? Old Age, Bad Choices, Poverty and Guns. Here's a Simple Solution! Become a Democrat, Green, Libertarian or an Independent! #DumpTrump #Runaway

REJECT FREAK KENNEDY! Write to your senator! Tell them to vote no!

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Aaron Standish

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