So far no response to my doing AA Step Eleven... I did my part but God did nothing... Deep Sigh... Silly me, I expected to receive knowledge... or Hints... or Clues... But I got Nothing...

Step Eleven: "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out."

If I read this step carefully I see that there is action required on my part [I pray for Knowledge] but nowhere in this step is there any action required on Gods part [No hint as to what his will for us is...] and I have been listening...

Silly me, I expected to receive knowledge... or Hints... or Clues... But I got Nothing...

I assume that the reason for a total lack of answers is that God does not exist. OR... maybe God does exist but always remains silent.  Either way, I am given total freedom of choice when it comes to my own behavior. God never takes any action no matter what I do or believe...  Whoo-hoo! I am free. So I choose to keep on doing what I was doing before... No new Ideas have wandered into my mind since I started practicing Step Eleven actively.

This makes me wonder why many different cultures invented the concept of God or Gods.
Indians in India have over a thousand different Gods... I guess that it is comforting to believe in a power greater than yourself... I really like the Aztec Gods... They have some really psychedelic paintings of what they look like. The main one is a feathered serpent that came down from the stars. It sounds like an Alien on a spaceship... They really liked building Pyramids. I wonder what the
goal was... In both Egypt and Mexico people built pyramids and yet, there is no clear use...


So, while I wait for God to do something, I'll continue to go to meetings and write blog posts... God, if you are reading this... wake up!

I read a book called "Journey to Awakening" by Ram Dass which gives simple instructions on How To Meditate but following his instructions revealed nothing. Oh well...

I suppose that the real reason that I'm having no progress on step eleven is that I should do the steps in NUMERICAL ORDER. I never really finished step one. That step requires that I believe that a higher power can restore myself to sanity. Nope, no higher power exists and so this imaginary higher power cannot do anything.

I do believe that the AA organization and having meetings does help me quit drinking. The power of peer pressure is valid. I chose to associate with other people that voluntarily select to not drink. We have meetings and tell each other that our lives are better without booze. This is a valid technique for me.

Bill Wilson created the Idea of AA during a 5 day long belladonna and henbane "cure". Both of those drugs are powerful hallucinogens. During his experience he saw a white light and met God personally. While I have never eaten belladonna or henbane I have eaten LSD and that does give the illusion of direct contact with God. Mr. Wilson's idea of forming a club where fellow alcoholics can meet and talk to each other is a great idea.  After AA was running for about 30 years Bill Wilson tried LSD. He was very enthusiastic about it initially as it would allow other members to have a religious experience. However he decided to not make any changes at all to the structure of AA. His belief was that the organization was working well and any change could make it stop functioning. Especially having millions of members taking the powerful hallucinogenic drug LSD.

Inca Sun God - drawing by gvan42

I recently read a fiction book called "The Shack". The hero meets God, Jesus and The Holy Spirit in person. A big question asked in the book is "Why is God So Mean?". The hero was telling his daughter a story about an American Indian princess who had to sacrifice her own life for the good
 of the tribe. After the story was over The Daughter asked "Why is God so mean? The Great Spirit made the princess jump off a cliff and made Jesus die on a Cross. That seems pretty mean to me." The hero's reply was... "Sweetheart, Jesus didn't think his daddy was mean.  He thought his daddy was full of love and loved him very much. His daddy didn't make him die, Jesus chose to die because he and his daddy love you and me and everyone in the world. He saved us from sickness, just like the Princess." This seems like an unsatisfying answer.

When you experience a Hurricane, Earthquake, Forest Fire or Tornado remember... God loves you, but he has a weird way of showing it... Maybe God is like an Autistic Child that loves to torture animals... Maybe the entire concept of God is a convenient excuse and a way to blame the victim...
Like the concept Karma in India. If you are experiencing a bad quality of life it is because you were bad in a previous life. That's a convenient excuse for poverty... If a starving person asks why life sucks, the Brahmin can simply say Karma! I was good in a previous life and that's why I was born rich and you were not. That way the rich can enjoy the fruits of the caste system without worry that the peasants will revolt. In other religions people pray for rain or a good crop. If they get drought, tough... That's just proof that you didn't pray right or hard enough. At least prayer gives the illusion that humans have some control over their own lives. That's more comforting than having to accept the random actions of the universe.
Maybe God does exist and is sending Hurricanes to Texas and Florida in punishment for our polluting the air with fossil fuels. That's what climate change science says... Global Warming is Real. The ocean gets hotter and more water evaporates. Then more water falls from clouds. While in California,the land gets hotter and we have more Forest Fires...
I believe that the concept of Hell was invented by people in order to have power over other people. For example: "Do what I tell you to do or GO TO Hell after you are dead." That's a very simple way to encourage obedience. The Church has used this mind trick to enslave powerless peasants. By convincing them that there is eternal damnation awaiting those who disobey, The Church creates willing slaves.

End of Message...

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